Crises Peeps, It’s Friday! I know I say this with religious fervor every Friday, but I am especially excited about this one as it is the first Friday since I have been back at work and it has been hectic! Getting back into the work swing of things after a luxurious 3 week holiday is tantamount to having a root canal without an anesthetic! By a herbal healer. In the bundu’s. Using pliers!
Never-the-less, I have managed to survive and while I have no witty work horror stories to share, I do have a funny little trinket from The Chef. Thunder and The Chef train together. And by train I mean go to the hell hole sespit known as The Gym, lift weights, etc etc and act like proper healthy gyming professionals. They even sweat. (Refer to this to hear my thoughts on the matter). Thunder and I used to run together so she’s pretty much a super athlete. Anyway, it was decided between the gyming professionals that a new regime would be designed for 2010 and this would include cardio ie: running. Basically, The Chefs worst nightmare. I was rather amused at this whole thing as I would obviously run rather than step foot into hell, but I suppose the Chef feels that same way about gyming and performing the evil quad destroying sport I love.
Cue Wednesday evening and a very woe-be-tide looking Chef:
Me: What’s wrong?
The Chef: Thunder and I went running…
Me: Awesome, how was it?
TC: I don’t want to talk about it
Me: Wow, that good hey???
TC: Everything hurts
Me: It usually does when you overzealously try to do something you haven’t done in ages (grinning like the Cheshire Cat)
TC: And what are you smiling at?
Me: Nothing…
TC: You’re just smiling like that because I looked at you this way after you came back from gym, aren’t you!
Now, this brings me onto my gym experience. I know, I confess, I broke my own rules. But for very good reason. I am training for The 2 Oceans 56km Ultra Marathon. I’ve stepped over the Boundaries of Craziness, bypassed the Valley’s of Sanity and have dived head first into the realm of Completely and Utterly Bonkers. I’m okay with that, really I am. So the reason for gym was what is known in gyming circles as “cross training”. WTF??? Apparently “cross training” is good for my running because it’ll work on muscles I don’t necessarily use when running. Why would I need to work on muscles I don’t use!!! Anyway, I did it. Morally I wasn’t feeling great because I was breaking my own rules, but I was so excited at the time I just couldn’t resist. I had visions of being super-fit, hitting the pro-circuit and doing a Forrest Gump “Run Forrest, Run” without even glowing.
There is a downside to this, let me tell you. Lunging across the gym carrying weights heavier that a bottle of Champagne is clearly not ideal for my apparently ageing body. After my 3rd set of everything; I tried, with as much elegance and poise as possible, to escape the nasty mechanical filled area only to find I could not move! Elegance and poise out the window and a waterfall of profanity sweeping through the building, I clawed my way down to my apartment and waited for The Chef to arrive.
The Chef: Oh goodness Crazii, what now?
Me: What ever do you mean?
TC: I mean you've splayed yourself ala a spatch-cocked chicken across the bed and have every appendage raised as if you’re praying to the god of butterflied chickens everywhere.
Me: Your supposed to keep sore limbs raised about your heart.
TC: I think that's when there’s actually something wrong with them!
Me: There is something wrong, it’s called death by stupidity/cross training! This makes me feel better, rather that than the death inducing pain I was feeling earlier. It was like childbirth.
TC: Because you would know.
Me: I do now!
TC: What are you doing tonight besides being annoying?
Me: I'm thinking of teaching myself how to paint with only my mouth.
TC: Very funny. Well I'm going for dinner, want to come?
Me: Only if you have a wheel chair and promise to feed me?
TC: Sweet lord.
I haven’t yet broken the news to the Chef (or Thunder) that I think “cross training” is a bunch of bollocks and I will not be entertaining the idea again, unless of course I get to be wheeled around in a fancy chair and hand fed pizza and ice cream!
conversations with a 2.5 year old
8 years ago
2 comments:
BAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....
I have just a few things to say to that:
1) i know for a fact that TC would never have said "sweet lord"
2)don't know what TC was complaining about its was a chilled run, which he did well on considering he hadn't run in over a month... wimp
3)i'm still laughing.... Bahahahahahaha
4)training builds..... ah... character... althought depends if you on the juice, there is a lady guy at gym bigger than TC... now thats BIG (Scary)
5)and if you actually stuck with the programme and did it more than once it would get easier and you would see a change... but thats just me :)
6)all in all i think different strokes work for different folks...Crazii you are a built runner, which is why you do it, love it and are great at it... Me not so much i fight my way through a run, still enjoy it but i'm better a lifing them weights... hence once again our yin and yang balance coming into play :)
7)Moral of the story don't mess with Crazii and Thunda becasue we make a mean team :)
OK I have to add my 2 cents and admit that I am on the fence on this one. Crazii I feel your pain... literally... I too thought it was a good idea to venture into the cross training realm - mistake number on. Mistake number 2 was that I thought it would be an even better idea to do it with my "once a marine always a marine" other half. Today I find myself having limited use of my upper body...no, not just my arms, my complete upper body!
But then again on the other side of the fence - Thunder I agree, once you get past the initial physical pain and are able to move suitably to do it again - it will soon become easier.
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