Remember my last post and how I so proudly said I was walking freely into the new year etc etc... well everything but one thing is true about that statement, the walking part! Upon our return from Key West and clearly still on a high from the incredible adventure/delicious cans of Strongbow; I made a pact with myself that I might actually try take this running business a bit more seriously. By this I mean maybe pound some tar once a week just to make sure the old legs, you know, stay in shape and whatever. So with this seed very well nestled in the "I am Crazii's evil twin" side of the brian... I joined a gym!
I know! Even as the words tumble onto the page, I am still in shock as to how this whole process started in motion. What started as a wonderful field trip discovering the inner workings of (all bars in) Key West ended with a signed piece of paper, a gym card and *gasp* and locker number surrounded by *gasp* sweat and *gasp* spandex! And to add insult to injury, the only class that seemed like a realistically feasible option started at 6am! Now I know what you're thinking... who in their currently unemployed state would voluntarily wake up at that hour of the morning to go to the gym... As I said before; Crazii's evil twin. However there is a very loosely interpreted reasonable explanation for this, namely I couldn't actually participate in any of the other classes for various reasons:
- Spinning - I value my rear end too much.
- Yoga - I haven't been able to touch my toes since my 10th birthday.
- Dance - My 2 left feet prohibit such an action, especially in public where injury may occur.
- Pilates - refer to point 2.
- Ab training - hahahahahahahahahahahaha, laughing at the sheer thought was training enough!
... which leaves only... 6. Cardio Bootcamp - Bingo!
My thinking this: it's cardio so basically running, which is essentially why I find myself in this predicament in the first place. I glossed over the bootcamp part for obvious reasons, namely the blatant connection with pain and possibility of cross training and set off to meet my new found running self! Wow, do my new found running self and I have seriously differing opinions of what running/exercise actually are.
- Day 1: weights, dumbells and some sort of thinking I can do sit ups, hahahahaha!
- Day 2: aerobic step climber, skipping rope and some sort of thinking I can do push ups, hahahahaha!
- Day 3: 2 mile TT (for those lucky enough not to know what TT stands for, it means torture treatment, also known as a time trial)
(insert all manner of creative words and phrases here)
Which brings me back to walking freely and now the complete inability to do so! With the bootcamp instructor literally being ex military and as svelt and toned as any abnormal female would be, it is the fear of future class punishment that keeps me returning week in and week out... she knows where I live and should I miss a class, I fear I might lose something a little more than the calories associated with my daily fried food intake! However (and this is Crazii's evil twin talking here) she has managed to convince my brain that maybe, just maybe, the ageless concept of cross training is not quite as insane as originally believed (see Sweat and Spandex: Ch 2 for my opinion on this matter) and the proof has literally been in the pudding:
- 5kms Time Trials in under 23 mins
- Half marathons in 1h46m
- Crazii doing sit ups and push ups
- (I've even been known to lift a few weights here and there, but don't spread the news around)
The major point however, being that after each wonderous achievement, walking usually becomes a problem. And whilst G.I. Jane doesn't seem to think this is a problem, my inability to walk to the phone and call for pizza delivery is seriously concerning!
