HALF THE DISTANCE, TWICE THE COURAGE

It is very strange in life how things work out. Emotionally very often, things that are within our reach are the hardest to see or grasp. Although we know they are there, there seem to be more obstacles to get across to them than things that we seemingly think are further away. In the same way, physically when we prepare for something we have never done before (ie: running a full marathon), once this is achieved small things such as a half marathon are assumed to be easy. This past weekend has been a very difficult journey for me. It evolved letting go of an immediate happiness in favour of a future greater happiness while at the same time running half the distance but experiencing twice the pain and resistance.

The Chef and I parted ways this weekend in what can only be described as a first for me. I have never broken up with someone before and didn’t really have any idea of how the situation was going to play out. It started on very amusing ground...

Me: Hi Chef, we need to talk.
Chef: What do we need to talk about?
Me: We need to talk about you and me.
Chef: Okay, why don’t you come round in about an hour?
Me: Ok, see you then

Now, as mentioned, I have never broken up with anyone before and therefore cannot take responsibility for what happened next:

Me: *knock knock*
No answer…
Me: *knock knock* again
No answer…
Me (in my head): Maybe he’s making me wait because he knows…
My Phone: *Ring Ring*
Me: Hello Chef
Chef: Hello Crazii, I’m here.
Me: Huh, what do you mean you’re there, I’m here?
Chef: What? I said I’d come to you
Me: No, you said ‘why don’t you come round in about an hour?’
Chef: No, I said 'why don’t I come round in about an hour?'
Me: Oh…
Chef: Oh…
Me: Right, so…
Chef: Why don’t you come back here and we’ll talk
Me: Right, okay!

Seriously, who does that! Who cocks up a break-up talk so badly before you’ve even had it. I called Thunder to explain the situation to her and her words of wisdom sounded a bit like this “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, only you Crazii, only you!”

Needless to say we had the break-up talk and Chef was great. Although rather surprised at the conversation and resistant to the outcome I was going for, he understood the reasoning behind it and didn’t make me feel like a complete idiot and/or cow! I want to thank him for that as well as showing me that sometimes the things you want in life are right in front of you, they just take more courage to reach.