ECCENTRIC, ME? PFFT!

So now that I am officially back to reality, I actually have to pay attention to the details of my life that need assistance ie: my knee (and my French I have decided, but that is another story). So as the diligent, non selfish runner that I am, I took myself off to “The Knee Guy” (note the element of sarcasm, I was pretty much bound and gagged by the physio). Wow was he a ball of laughs! (The Knee Guy, my actual physio is wonderful.)

The Knee Guy: So, where do you have pain?
Me: Ummm…. (panic eyes setting in, check label on door, yip definitely in the right place), my knee?
TKG: Yes, which one?
Me: Ah, right, the left one.
TKG: (pulling and shifting and doing whatever he was doing) any of this hurt?
Me: Well if I was an elastic band, maybe not, but as it would have it, YES!
TKG: Okay, I think you need an MRI
Me: Wow, you’re a genius, that’s what I thought I was here for…

20 minutes under a machine that you have to sit deathly still in, otherwise your images come up looking like one of my cake disasters, my results come in.

TKG: Wow, there’s a lot of inflammation around the Patella and ITB joint. You could have lsdkjflsjflsjkflkjaslkfjlskjf…………
Me: Excuse me, anglais s’il vous plait?
TKG: No running for 2 months and eccentric strength training for 8 weeks, 3 times a week.
Me: Is that for my personality or my knee?
TKG: Here’s your script, physio is upstairs.
Me: Right, bye Mr Cheerful.

And upstairs I trot (literally running up the stairs as my way of being very adult about this whole process and sticking my tongue out at the man downstairs) to meet my physio.

Me: Hello, I’m here to see my physio.
Receptionist: Okay, please take a seat, he’ll be out shortly.
Me: *SWOON* Helllllooooooo….
Hot Physio: Hello Miss Crazii, what can I do for you today?
Me: Hmmm. Well if you really want to know… ummm, I mean, script, dude downstairs, something about being Crazii?
HP: Ah yes, eccentric strength training.
ME: that’s the one.
HP: Right, come with me
Me: With the greatest of pleasure…

And then he put me on a bicycle…

Me: WTF???
HP: What you have to do is resist the momentum of the bicycle.
Me: Why?
HP: Because it will strengthen the muscles around the knee cap and quads so we can get you out of here and back on the road.
Me: Well firstly I don’t really want to leave and I’ve never given up on the road.
HP: So you’re still running then?
Me: yeeeesssss…..
HP: You know that will hamper your progress and you will be here for longer?
Me: Perfect, how much mileage a week will keep me here until I’ve met your mom?
HP: Right, I can see you’re going to be one of “those” patients…
Me: By those you mean the one you want to take home to meet your mother?
HP: No, buy those I mean difficult.
Me: Let’s call me eccentric and see where that gets us…

Needless to say I peddled, or in fact resisted peddling for the duration of the session and am due back again on Saturday. I think this might be the first time I’m excited to be on a bicycle in spandex, sweating.